How do you know if someone’s the right fit for you? Do you evaluate them based on their music playlist, movie watchlist, or whether they’re a mountain or beach person? You might be confusing shared interests with true markers of emotional compatibility. They may spark conversations and create initial connections, but maybe they rarely go beyond surface-level understanding. Relationships aren't built of moodboards, playlists and bucketlists. The right relationships will make you feel safe and be your best self.
ALSO READ: How long should you hug your partner? Expert shares 3 small habits that can transform your intimacy
Relationship expert Jillian Turecki, who regularly shares relationship tips, took to Instagram on April 26 and shared four ways you can identify who's the right fit for you:
1. Trust your instincts
- When someone doesn't fully choose you, your nervous system knows it, and it will keep sounding the alarm.
- Choose the person who doesn't make you question where you stand in their life.
2. No ‘what are we’ dilemma
- If someone doesn't choose you, fully and freely, you are not in a relationship, you are in a lesson. And that lesson is to choose yourself.
- To stop settling for half-hearted love that leaves you anxious and depleted. You need a partner who stands beside you without hesitation.
3. No more bare minimum
- Raise your standards.
- Choose people who bring kindness and emotional generosity to the table.
4. Choose carefully
- The person you choose isn't random- they are a mirror of your beliefs, your standards and your emotional conditioning.
- Who you choose is filtered through what you believe you deserve.
Important aspects like clarity, empathy, emotional safety, mutual respect, trust and effective communication are crucial for determining your compatibility. These will help both feel seen, heard and truly connected.
ALSO READ: Gaslighting to victim blaming: 5 signs your partner is emotionally manipulating you
Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice.